Sunday, October 9, 2011

Is it, could it be?

My heart is heavy as I begin this blog, heavy in frustration, heavy in exasperation, heavy in physically and mentally throwing my hands in the air. 

Our nemesis, human will and disobedience, is coming out of Bryton in the world of naptime.  He's been fighting us and winning.  My naptime routine (which was normally, cook, clean and me time), has become every ten minutes going in and telling Bryton to be quiet, or put away his toys, or walking him back to bed.  It has left me frustrated, angry even, and has been a great test on my own character to not sin in my anger. 

And this is my life every day recently.

Some say he's ready to give up his nap.  Age wise, he may be?  But I also know how he acts and misbehaves as the day goes on, which is much increased if there is no nap to be had.

We've taken away privileges.  We've even bribed.  (Which I'm ashamed of...)  Nothing is working, and I'm aware of one thing. 

{I. Can't. Make. Him. Sleep.}

Can I make him lie in bed, even if it means working me up to the brink of breaking... yes.

Can I scold him and take away privileges... yes.

Is it best for him in the long run... no.

And somewhere in me is this drive that "I deserve his respect and obedience," and I ask myself, "do I really?"

Have I earned that in the anger I've had towards him during these naptime periods?

Is this a battle worth fighting?

If I step back and don't demand his obedience here, will he take advantage of us and disobey elsewhere... and... is this even about obedience at all?  Maybe he's just. not. tired. 

One thing I've learned about parenting... it'll forever keep you humble and will forever open opportunities for God to continue to refine you... there are always tests, always questioning whether what you are doing is best meeting their needs... best caring for them...

Phew.  His no naps have made me tired...

Any advice out there in blogworld?



  1. Ugggggh, I'm not looking forward to this day! I will say that I have had several Mama's tell me this: It doesn't matter how old a kid is (okay, okay, so eventually this stops, too...) but well until a child is 4,5, or 6 they should be required to partake of an hour of "quiet time" - even if they don't sleep, they will play in their room quietly, watch a movie quietly, read, whatever... and not come out until their hour is up. That may mean that evening routine needs to change, and bed time might be earlier to compensate for the lost nap, but they must absolutely learn to have some quiet time.

    Because like you say, you can't force them to sleep! And some days he may want and take a nap, so the routine still needs to be there. Our kids are so bombarded with ACTION these days (their toys blink and sing and dance and roll around, etc etc) that it's good for them to learn to slow down and entertain themselves.

    Anyway, seeing how I'm not there yet I can't act like I have it figured out. I just know that quiet time is essential well into the preschool years. And this may just be a phase of no napping, Q went through one...

    Maybe it's just the change and being in a new place? Kids act out in the weirdest ways. Hang in there, because I know how disheartening it is to let go of that "me" time. Sprig has pretty much given up her morning nap now, and I'm already trying to rework my days around that. Always something!!!

  2. Amen sister! Always something! B has done this once before, for about a month right around two, so I refuse to totally stop it, and he's been required a quiet time lately. I think I'm going to put a timer in his room and tell him he has to stay in there quietly until the timer goes off... then he can get up. HOPEFULLY he'll get bored enough in that period of time that he sleeps ;) LOL. It's so hard right now because if he doesn't sleep then he's in trouble a lot more in the evenings for acting out... if he does sleep it's much more difficult for him to go to sleep at night... there has to be a happy medium somewhere, right??? AHHHHH!