Friday, March 11, 2011

Trauma for the Momma

Okay - another thing this mom has completely blocked out of her mind with Bryton:  the belly button.  And to be honest, now that I've remembered that I don't remember it, I still can't collect it.  I remember that it fell off (which I remember only because of it's current absence) and that he had one at one time (I have pictures to prove it.)  The caring for it and the event of it actually falling off I must have mentally blocked out due to absolute trauma and worry.
Now I'm being forced to relive this event I don't even remember.  Ansley's umbilical cord stump caused for my first traumatic event yesterday.  (Okay, traumatic may be a little bit of an exaggeration, but you must keep in mind that I'm still hormonal and you get very concerned with little things when your kids are little.)
It all started in the morning when Ansley woke up.  Picking her up I could smell her and thought, "Yay, she pooped!"  (Which she's not been doing much of lately.)  When I got into her clothing I realized she had a lot blood on the inside of her sleeper, and she had no dirty diaper.  The smell was coming from her cord and on moving her cord just slightly I could see very pink and fleshy skin underneath.  More like the appearance of an organ sticking out. 
So once I regained some clarity (and apologized to Ansley 100 times - I must be at fault for this somehow) I called the Dr.'s office.  On describing it they said it sounded pretty normal and to just wait until our appointment that was scheduled for today to have the doctor look at it.
Then she napped, woke up again, more blood, worse smell, and more of that fleshy organy looking area.  I called back and was on my way down to the doctor's office in 15 minutes, thinking to myself as I'm driving, "I've ruined her, she's going to have to have surgery, she has to be in so much pain (though she was snoozing away in the backseat), and she'll never look normal."  (Remember the hormones?  Ah hem.)
Long story short, the doctor assured me that her cord was not only fine but probably just days away from falling off (which I admit will be a traumatic event for me anyway - this whole thing kind of creeps me out anyway).  Apparently this fleshy organy appearance is normal and the smell is too as long as it's not accompanied by puss and fever, neither of which she has. 
No wonder my mind blocked this out.  I worried about her cord all night last night after the Dr. assured me it was okay.  Can't imagine how much I freaked with Bryton.  Apparently it's more traumatic that child birth because my mind won't let me recall it. 
I know this too shall pass, and she'll have that cute little belly button soon, so as proof of her 'newness' and the last little connection to me, I'll appreciate this with the rest. 


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