Thursday, June 10, 2010

The Minor Characters

Well, after my last post this one seems appropriate for two reasons.  First of all, I've set a goal for myself that before child number 2 is born in the Gregg household I plan to read the entire Bible from start to finish.  I've already started, I figure I should get a head start on things like this. 
Secondly, this post is appropriate because of what I just read today.  I was reading in Genesis 30 where Rachel and Leah are having a conception war, trying to 'outkid' the other (and maybe earn Jacob's love at the same time.) 
There is this huge rivalry between the sisters and it seems the only settling is having babies.  When both women are having trouble having babies what do they do?  Well, they go find their maids, or servants, sleep with Jacob (their husband) to have babies for them. 
All polygamy aside (that's a whole other post), but let's talk about Zilpah and Bilhah for a bit, shall we?
Okay, so here are these women sitting around doing their jobs, so to speak.  We must assume that these women are aware of the tension in the household, and suddenly they are ripped into the middle of it, being forced to sleep with their bosses' husband.  (This doesn't happen everyday, now, does it?) 
Okay, on this level I feel extremely sorry for these two ladies already.  Speaking from a strictly female perspective, but on an intimacy level, I'm a whole lot more likely to be 'in the mood' if I have some kind of 'non-sexual' chemistry / intimacy with an individual anyway.  So these women, in my opinion. are like prostitutes who don't get paid... or maybe kind of raped in a way?  Anyway, I can't imagine this was a pleasurable experience for either one of them. 
Then, they get to carry this man's baby for 10 months to have the baby stripped from them and given to this other woman who claims the child is hers. 
This is where my heart fumes a little.  I'll be honest, one of the first thoughts I had after holding Bryton for the first time (besides, owwwww), was "how do women give up a baby?"  I totally understand that there are circumstances that make giving up a child necessary, and am also very aware that this gives baby a better chance at a better life, but as a mother I cannot understand carrying this being in your womb, knowing this baby for so long, and then handing him / her to someone else forever.  Rip my heart out, please, but don't take my child.  After the connection I felt with Bryton, I felt protective of other people holding him (besides Aaron) because "they didn't know him like I did.  How dare they intrude on our bond."  I'm not lying, honest.    I did get much better with that pretty quickly, by the way.
But here are these women who are forced to give up these babies, who carry half their genes, and watch another woman raise them, love them, claim them.  It makes my heart and my will wrench.  It's not in my nature to see this happen. 
So, in short, I'm glad polygamy and slavery are out the window.  I'm not all about sharing husbands and children... nope, not about it at all.  Call me selfish. 

1 comment:

  1. Amen sista! i totally feel ya on this. i thought i was the only one who felt funny about people wanting to hold MY babies whom I carried for those nine months...they didnt know them like i did! and honestly, i am still trying but it is hard everytime to hand them over to someone else...seriously! i remember leaving them with my mom the week after they were born to have my staple removal and being shocked to return home an hour and a half later to find two happy, fed, changed, sleeping angels...i couldn't believe anyone else could take care of them like i could!