Something happened to me during the summer after my junior year of high school, we'll call it a major call to repentance after a brief period of rebellion, but it changed everything. Jesus consumed and covered every bit of me and every part of my life. It was noticeable, and apparently, it was offensive. Thus- my senior year was hard.
I was bold, possibly to a fault, but not the blatant 'you're going to hell' bold. No, but I did have a t-shirt I made that said "Elect Jesus Christ personal Lord and Savior" during election time. I talked about Jesus, sang about Jesus, and carried my Bible everywhere. It effected the choices I made with friends, conversations, and extracurricular activities. It was only a matter of time. Before I knew it I was being called Jesus... as if it were derogatory... by people I'd been friends with my entire life. I became lonely very quickly. I was voted 'most likely to change after high school'. (And I hope I have changed... that my passion for Jesus is more intense and sincere now than it was then... but I'm sure that's not what they were implying.)
All of that to say this:
It's amazing where you'll find worship. We have grown to be very fond of the movie Frozen. How fond you ask? We saw it twice in the movie theater, it's been preordered since January 7th, darling daughter owns an Elsa dress, and is soon to have fathead wall stick ons, a gift from Gaga for her birthday, and an Elsa doll from her brother. We also own the soundtrack. The kids can almost sing every word to most of the songs. It was on this cd that I heard the Demi Lovato version of the song and these lyrics spoke to the 2003 version of myself... and were re-enforced to my 2014 self.
I posted a line of the song on my facebook a week or so ago. A friend posted the exact same lyric today and it occurred to me, 'wow, it's not just me,' and I felt the need to share.
I'm posting the lyrics and emphasizing the ones that brought great joy to my heart, that His work in my life was so revolutionizing that it was easy to leave the life I once had... and that He's continuing that work in me.
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, Let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
The snow glows white on the mountain tonight
Not a footprint to be seen
A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I'm the queen
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside
Couldn't keep it in
Heaven knows I tried
Don't let them in, don't let them see
Be the good girl you always had to be
Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know
Well now they know
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand
And here I'll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway
It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all
Up here in the cold thin air I finally can breathe
I know I left a life behind but I'm too relieved to grieve
Let it go, Let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, Let it go,
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand
And here I'll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway
Standing - frozen in the life I've chosen
You won't find me, the past is all behind me
Buried in the snow
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go,
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand
And here I'll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway...
(let the music go on)
let it go, let it go
Let it go, let it go
As you can see... it started with one line... "I know I left a life behind, but I'm too relieved to grieve" and the more I studied the lyrics, the more worship I felt... the more thankful for His work in my life. Where my life would be without Him, I'd prefer not to know... more than happy to leave that life behind...
Lettin' it go... day after day... and changing for the better...
-A
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