The Minor Characters

Well, after my last post this one seems appropriate for two reasons.  First of all, I've set a goal for myself that before child number 2 is born in the Gregg household I plan to read the entire Bible from start to finish.  I've already started, I figure I should get a head start on things like this. 
Secondly, this post is appropriate because of what I just read today.  I was reading in Genesis 30 where Rachel and Leah are having a conception war, trying to 'outkid' the other (and maybe earn Jacob's love at the same time.) 
There is this huge rivalry between the sisters and it seems the only settling is having babies.  When both women are having trouble having babies what do they do?  Well, they go find their maids, or servants, sleep with Jacob (their husband) to have babies for them. 
All polygamy aside (that's a whole other post), but let's talk about Zilpah and Bilhah for a bit, shall we?
Okay, so here are these women sitting around doing their jobs, so to speak.  We must assume that these women are aware of the tension in the household, and suddenly they are ripped into the middle of it, being forced to sleep with their bosses' husband.  (This doesn't happen everyday, now, does it?) 
Okay, on this level I feel extremely sorry for these two ladies already.  Speaking from a strictly female perspective, but on an intimacy level, I'm a whole lot more likely to be 'in the mood' if I have some kind of 'non-sexual' chemistry / intimacy with an individual anyway.  So these women, in my opinion. are like prostitutes who don't get paid... or maybe kind of raped in a way?  Anyway, I can't imagine this was a pleasurable experience for either one of them. 
Then, they get to carry this man's baby for 10 months to have the baby stripped from them and given to this other woman who claims the child is hers. 
This is where my heart fumes a little.  I'll be honest, one of the first thoughts I had after holding Bryton for the first time (besides, owwwww), was "how do women give up a baby?"  I totally understand that there are circumstances that make giving up a child necessary, and am also very aware that this gives baby a better chance at a better life, but as a mother I cannot understand carrying this being in your womb, knowing this baby for so long, and then handing him / her to someone else forever.  Rip my heart out, please, but don't take my child.  After the connection I felt with Bryton, I felt protective of other people holding him (besides Aaron) because "they didn't know him like I did.  How dare they intrude on our bond."  I'm not lying, honest.    I did get much better with that pretty quickly, by the way.
But here are these women who are forced to give up these babies, who carry half their genes, and watch another woman raise them, love them, claim them.  It makes my heart and my will wrench.  It's not in my nature to see this happen. 
So, in short, I'm glad polygamy and slavery are out the window.  I'm not all about sharing husbands and children... nope, not about it at all.  Call me selfish. 
-a

The "basement"

Which really is in reference to 'the baby' if you are one of the youth girls.  It's a long story, really, but let's just say that the finishing of our basement and the birth of baby number 2 come in one package ;) 
Anyway, I've been waiting since January, anticipating the coming of summer to start working on baby number 2.  I've subscribed back to many of my pregnancy sites, read tons of info on conceiving, and if I'm honest, stressed a little about the 'what if' that I don't get pregnant quickly, or even worse, at all. 
See, I'm going about this WAY differently than I did last time.  Last time Aaron and I decided to be pretty hush hush about 'trying' to begin with.  I didn't want people constantly asking, in the event that it did take forever.  Then, when we got pregnant (which didn't take long), I'd heard sooooo many stories of miscarriage on the road that aside from very close friends and family we told no one until I was almost completely through my first trimester.  I dreaded the idea of having to tell all of those supportive friends that we had lost a baby, that my body had failed. 
I don't know what is so different this time.  Maybe it's that I've been so vocal about wanting another for so long.  Maybe it's the comfort level of those around me.  Maybe I'm too overly confident that all will go well this time since it did the first time.  And honestly, the last one scares me the most. 
But all in all, it's summer, and we're preparing to hopefully give B a brother or sister somewhere around this time next year. 
So currently we're praying for God's will, a healthy baby, an easy pregnancy (minus platelet issues), and quick conception.  (Anytime in the next 5 months would fit my agenda perfectly.  Notice I said 'my' agenda... we'll see what God has in store.) 
So, that's where we are right now on that front.  Oh yeah, and I guess we better get to work on the basement ;)

Vacation

Well, there's not been a whole lot on the couponing front with vacation and all, but there is still plenty going on. With a whole week (an unexpected week I should add) away from the computer, I guess I should fill everyone in on our vacation. So let's see:
We left on Thursday night to go to Aaron's parent's house in STL. Aaron was golfing in Waterloo so I picked him up on the way.
We weren't leaving until Saturday so we took Bryton to the zoo for his first trip on Friday. We went early to get into the children's zoo free (it's free from 8:00 - 9:00!, beats $8 for Aaron and I to be able to take Bryton in!). He loved the goats! In fact, I think this may have almost been his favorite part of the day because he could get up close and pet them. The rest of the day he was really odd, quiet, almost in awe. He didn't say much, but pointed from time to time. It was fun watching him check it all out!
Saturday we left for vacation. I was nervous to say the least. Bryton does NOT sleep in the car and he does NOT enjoy the car. He hasn't enjoyed the car since about 6 months or so. Now that he's mobile he just wants out. So, four hours in the car did NOT sound exciting. I had a stockpile of toys in his floorboard that I could hand him, Easter eggs filled with cheerios and raisins (one of the best tricks in our book, he loves shaking them and opening them to see whats inside... huge time burner!), and his blanket and lovey (one can wish, right?). Believe it or not, he did great on the way there! I was ecstatic. No nap, but beggers can't be choosers. We got checked in at the condo and took Bryton down, after a short nap, to the pool.
The pool with a 19 month old is interesting. Last year in August we stuck him in a baby ring, pulled him around the pool and he looooved it. Now, Mr. Mobility isn't happy in a swing, and if he can touch at all (baby pool), he wants off on his own. It was a fight from A - Z. We finally figured out we are better off in the big pool holding him.
Overall vacation was relaxing, swimming, shuffleboard, an attempt at horseshoes, some light shopping, miniature golfing, virgin strawberry daquiris, etc, BUT, Aaron and I took one day to do the ziplines at Branson Zipline. In fact, we just did one, the blue streak. AMAZING! 2000 feet on a zipline that was running, on that particular day, as fast as it would run, then a 70 foot free fall off of the tower. Amazing. I love doing things I've not done before, and this was exhilerating. We had a great time!
The ride home was not near as good as the ride there, but we made it, and we're finally back into a routine, I think.
That is, until the end of the month when Bryton stays with Gammy for a week while we are at camp. I'm totally bummed to leave him for a week. That's coming quick! June is a crazy month!

Something About Parenting...

There’s something about being a parent that makes God’s love even harder to comprehend. I know, that sounds backwards compared to everything I’ve ever heard, but it’s true. There is this certain mysterious love that is unlocked the moment you first lock eyes with your child. It is a relentless, unyielding, yearning kind of love. It’s the kind of love that takes your breath away. There is a great responsibility with this love, but with the responsibility comes a great blessing.
For the first time in my life I think I might be able to comprehend an unchanging, steadfast love, and at the same time, I can’t believe a God that I can’t see, or anyone that I can, could feel the same way about me that I feel about my son, not to mention love me any stronger. Parenting makes the knowing in my head that Jesus loves me transfer to my heart.
There’s something about watching Bryton learn new things and say new things that makes me wonder if God was smiling when I hit my first homerun. It’s something so trivial, but it’s usually the trivial things that Bryton accomplishes that makes me most proud.
There’s this urgency in my heart for him to love Jesus. I’m almost ashamed to say that I feel this urgency for him even more deeply than I did for myself prior to my own salvation. I love Jesus with all I am, and I’ll never be more proud of Bryton than the day, God willing, that he comes to know and love Jesus.
It’s the unselfish, love others as yourself kind of love that Jesus talked about. And I wonder if God feels the same hurt for me that I feel for Bryton when he’s sad, or hurt, or upset. I wonder if God feels the same joy for me that I feel when Bryton succeeds at something or simply smiles.
And all of the wondering leads me to a deeper understanding that I may never understand the heart of God. To love a husband like I love my husband and to see marriage in it’s spiritual context, and to love my son like I love my son and to see parenting through God’s eyes as our ‘Father’, it shows me that despite two very deep kinds of love there is a greater love out there that exists, and that love exists for me and for you. It’s the love of God that loves my husband and my son more than I ever could. And, though unfathomable, He holds that same kind of love for each one of us.